I appreciate it. [ And because this is a mess, and he really doesn't know what's going on, he lets his thoughts yawn open to find voice and hopefully clarity. ] Really.
[ oh no. she has to look for a spot in the party where she can be alone before she answers. ]
I wish to do better, I truly do.
[ shame, exhaustion – and loneliness fill the connection before she can reel the emotioins back in. it's been a long day and she misses Aemond. even Aegon. she simply cannot allow her behavior to push more people away from her. ]
[ Oh. That loneliness hits him like a wave, too familiar, and the urge hits for a second to go to her. Be with her. Support her where she can see him, not hidden away in his little house in the treeline.
He keeps himself still. Pours it into his words instead, warmth, undeniable presence. ]
You're doing fine, Alicent. I'm grateful. I just wasn't expecting the name drop.
[ And he could end it there, sign off, wish her the best again. But he'd felt that churn of emotion. He doesn't really want to leave her alone with it. ]
Is it too early to excuse yourself? I think you might need rest sooner than it's coming for you.
[ she realizes she does want the company, badly. being alone in the crowd is the last thing she wants, but it would be selfish and wrong to leave. and she's let this situation develop too far already. she pushes away the warmth and the feelings it wakened in her. ]
My presence is required here. I must oversee the banquet to the end and then there will be the plays. Billy is organizing one-- [ that alone should speak volumes for her reasons to stay. she tries to hide her reluctance, appear efficient instead. ] I can rest once the celebrations are over, but thank you for being so thoughtful.
Billy's staging the Terminator with a bunch of under-twelves. What's the worst that could happen? [ But he realises, abruptly, that he neither wants or needs an accurate answer to that question. So, moving on - ] Would it help if I put in an appearance?
[ Billy could use literally any other adult, he fears.
A brief gripping hurt as she invokes Nami - the oddly good kind, reminder both that someone cares and remembers - but he's back on form quickly enough. ]
Or you could be right and I shouldn't be alone. [ Ha, take that. ] I'll come by to grab some food. I will be leaving you before the plays start, though, so don't get too excited.
[ if she wasn't so tired, she would fight him. she also realizes how odd it would seem if she simply forbade him from attending. no, she can be normal about seeing him and thinking about his husbands and other contacts. defeated, she sighs. ]
I will see to it that you do eat, so be careful with what you promise.
no subject
I appreciate it. [ And because this is a mess, and he really doesn't know what's going on, he lets his thoughts yawn open to find voice and hopefully clarity. ] Really.
no subject
I wish to do better, I truly do.
[ shame, exhaustion – and loneliness fill the connection before she can reel the emotioins back in. it's been a long day and she misses Aemond. even Aegon. she simply cannot allow her behavior to push more people away from her. ]
no subject
He keeps himself still. Pours it into his words instead, warmth, undeniable presence. ]
You're doing fine, Alicent. I'm grateful. I just wasn't expecting the name drop.
[ And he could end it there, sign off, wish her the best again. But he'd felt that churn of emotion. He doesn't really want to leave her alone with it. ]
Is it too early to excuse yourself? I think you might need rest sooner than it's coming for you.
no subject
My presence is required here. I must oversee the banquet to the end and then there will be the plays. Billy is organizing one-- [ that alone should speak volumes for her reasons to stay. she tries to hide her reluctance, appear efficient instead. ] I can rest once the celebrations are over, but thank you for being so thoughtful.
no subject
Billy's staging the Terminator with a bunch of under-twelves. What's the worst that could happen? [ But he realises, abruptly, that he neither wants or needs an accurate answer to that question. So, moving on - ] Would it help if I put in an appearance?
no subject
no subject
[ It would definitely not help Billy. ]
no subject
I cannot ask you to do that. Everything is going well. You must look after yourself first.
[ it's not mourning, exactly, but he can't be all right after losing his "wife" and friends. ]
I believe that is what Nami would have told you as well.
no subject
A brief gripping hurt as she invokes Nami - the oddly good kind, reminder both that someone cares and remembers - but he's back on form quickly enough. ]
Or you could be right and I shouldn't be alone. [ Ha, take that. ] I'll come by to grab some food. I will be leaving you before the plays start, though, so don't get too excited.
no subject
[ if she wasn't so tired, she would fight him. she also realizes how odd it would seem if she simply forbade him from attending. no, she can be normal about seeing him and thinking about his husbands and other contacts. defeated, she sighs. ]
I will see to it that you do eat, so be careful with what you promise.
no subject
I can live with that. Save me a plate.