I've come close. Something clawing at me from the inside with what felt like blunt fingers. Too many. I leak a fluid that interferes with the nervous response of anyone it enters, causes their body to misremember itself, feel differently. [ Function differently. Nami has almost died. ] It blinded me eventually. Started crawling up my throat.
I don't know what it'll be when it emerges, but I intend to do everything in my power not to find out.
Do you have a room at the boarding house? Do you share it with anyone?
[ this is rude, she knows, but preparations must be done. and she's desperate to help. if yelling at him will make any sort of difference, she has to do it. ]
[ It's the only thing she could ask that he can't promise. The only people he wants to be around are those of them who already understand, and even then it feels too soon. ]
[ Almost everyone he cares for he's fucked over. Who is he supposed to call without inflicting his pain on the very people whose pain he's inflicted? ]
Wanda's the only person here who can contain me as I am. If it's too late for one of us to help [ One of us, she'll know who he means but he's going to have to get himself out of that habit - ] she's the final resort.
Fucking me's never sounded like quite so grim a fate. [ But there's no point in snapping at her. It not her he's angry with. ] I'm going to go now. I'll let you know when I know where I'll be. If you don't hear from me, I'll see you next month.
[ That's cruel, but he's feeling too much at once to regulate now. And it's not completely outside of the realm of possibility that he's going to die within the hour, so. ]
I do not have a say in whether or not John Gaius sees fit to end my life, Alicent. I don't have any designs on losing it, but I will not leave him there, and some things are outside of my control.
I let him loose, he healed our wounds, I left him.
[ There is so much unsaid in that brief description that it's almost laughable. But it'll do. He's too raw from it to be more honest, and she only need to know he's well. ]
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[ a man capable of immobilizing a god – he must be as dangerous as Murphy or worse. ]
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I've come close. Something clawing at me from the inside with what felt like blunt fingers. Too many. I leak a fluid that interferes with the nervous response of anyone it enters, causes their body to misremember itself, feel differently. [ Function differently. Nami has almost died. ] It blinded me eventually. Started crawling up my throat.
I don't know what it'll be when it emerges, but I intend to do everything in my power not to find out.
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I trust you will, but it isn't always within our power to do so, Stephen. As you well know.
You should not be alone, not at a time like this.
[ or any other. gods. the potential of the damage he could have done earlier is slowly hitting her. ]
cw: death wish
I'll try to make arrangements.
[ When he's done with John. If John doesn't do them all a favour and strike him down before he can leave the property. ]
Thank you, Alicent. You're right.
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Do you have a room at the boarding house? Do you share it with anyone?
[ this is rude, she knows, but preparations must be done. and she's desperate to help. if yelling at him will make any sort of difference, she has to do it. ]
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I do, but I won't be going there.
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This town cannot handle another monster so soon. Not another monster like him.
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It'll be alright. I don't think that was a regular transformation. I'll make sure to reach out to someone if I sense a risk.
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[ so she knows who to call if the worst comes to the worst. ]
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[ Almost everyone he cares for he's fucked over. Who is he supposed to call without inflicting his pain on the very people whose pain he's inflicted? ]
Wanda's the only person here who can contain me as I am. If it's too late for one of us to help [ One of us, she'll know who he means but he's going to have to get himself out of that habit - ] she's the final resort.
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I would prefer if it didn't come down to the final resort.
And so would you.
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Fine. ]
Kovacs.
[ If the worst comes to the worst. ]
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He will do what must be done.
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Fucking me's never sounded like quite so grim a fate. [ But there's no point in snapping at her. It not her he's angry with. ] I'm going to go now. I'll let you know when I know where I'll be. If you don't hear from me, I'll see you next month.
[ That's cruel, but he's feeling too much at once to regulate now. And it's not completely outside of the realm of possibility that he's going to die within the hour, so. ]
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I thought you were too intelligent to fall victim to self-pity, Stephen.
If I don't hear from you, I will see to it personally that the Duchess never releases you from her castle.
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Please be careful.
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You'll hear from me.
[ One way or another. Sooner or later. He'll only leave her in the dark if he has no other choice. ]
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I'm fine. [ In one extremely limited sense of the word: alive, at least. ] Thank you for your concern. I'm sorry for being an asshole about it.
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It's no matter.
Tell me what happened.
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[ There is so much unsaid in that brief description that it's almost laughable. But it'll do. He's too raw from it to be more honest, and she only need to know he's well. ]
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He knew you were not to blame.
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